Our Adoption Journey

We made it. Whew. What a long long travel day yesterday! 22 hours from the time we left our hotel in Bogota until pulling into our driveway. Some highlights of our trip home:

-Jeff stepped in dog poop outside of our hotel and reeked for the next several hours.
-Jesus threw up on both flights and a couple times at the airport. Luckily for me, Jeff got to deal with that.
-There were individual tvs on our flight from Bogota to New York which was good and bad. Good-the boys thought that was awesome and it kept everyone occupied on the 6 hour flight. Bad-Our flight was at midnight and the boys chose to play instead of sleep.
-Customs sucks. The people were rude and it took so long that Ava wet her pants.
-The kids did great waiting from 6 until 2 for our second flight. They all slept at some point at the airport.
-Our amazing family was waiting at the airport with balloons and signs. It was great for all of us to see them.

Our first night home was fun. The boys love the house, the cats, and Bella. Jesus loves playing with Ava and Gracie’s toys. He was so cute last night playing doll house and pretending to cook everyone supper with Ava’s kitchen. Victor wasn’t sure what to do. We dont’ have as many older kid toys so he spent the evening peeking in every room and closet with a small flashlight he found. We all fell asleep together watching Dancing with the Stars. I can’t even tell you how great it is to be back.

Today the boys have been so good. Jeff’s work has been awesome and he doesn’t have to go back until Monday so its been nice having him here too. Jeff made everyone eggs this morning for breakfast and then we took off for Target. Jesus has been talking about a bike since we first met him so that was going to be the first thing we did. At target we learned that he did not know how to ride a bike even though his file says it is one of his favorite activities. But he’s such a fast learner that he is already out biking now. We also bought the boys gloves and hats because its so cold here. The boys couldn’t figure out how to put on their gloves. They’ve never done it before. After shopping and riding bikes we had lunch at my mom’s house with my grandpa wilbur. It was great to introduce the boys to him. We expected to just hang out at our house today but with all the bike riding the boys have been doing, several neighborhood kids have gravitated over. The boys are having so much fun playing with them!

And that’s about it as of now. Jeff and I just keep on saying how great it is to be home. We thank everyone for your support and prayers. It means so much to us.

Ok so i got up this morning to start searching for flights home. Here’s the problem, we have 7 people now instead of 5 coming down so its not quite as easy. I appears that the flight we were hoping to take tomorrow from Atlanta to Cincinnati only has 1 more available seat on it. Awesome. The other problem is, I can’t really book anything until I pick up the boy’s visas this afternoon at 3:00. Our options to come home are to either leave tonight around mid-night and have a crazy travel schedule flying through either New York, or Washington, or leave at mid-night tomorrow night and have the same crazy schedule. A final option is to stay here until Wednesday and pick up the scheduled flight we were hoping to get tomorrow. My gut tells me we will leave tonight around mid-night on one of the flights routing through New York-Kennedy and get in sometime around 3:40 or so in Cincinnati tomorrow afternoon. I found one flight that has a 7:39 layover. This is assuming of course that nothing wrong with the visas and I’m able to pick them up at 3:00. We’ll keep you all posted.

So its looking right now that we will be traveling on Tuesday to come home. We were hopeful up until 4:30 yesterday that we might be able to come home today, but clearly that didn’t happen. While it is somewhat of a bummer, we are all in a good mood about it. Most of all, I think its nice finally having a day. We also have to recognize that we are way ahead of the game. If we leave on Tuesday that will be exactly three weeks and one day. Typically it takes people working with our agency 4 to 4 1/2 weeks total, so we can’t complain.

Yesterday morning we got up at 7:00 to go finalize paperwork at ICBF at 8:00, and then were planning on heading straight to the US Embassy by 9:00. First of all, we got to the ICBF office around 8:10 and of course the room where we needed to go was locked. The guy who needed to open it didn’t get to work until maybe 8:45. Can you say casual Friday? We’ve mentioned before, but its also a holiday on Monday here, so note that its a Friday before a holiday weekend. We were there to get one paper, and so our agency worker Andres went in the room (ahead of everyone – more on that later) to get it. There must have been a problem because it took over 2 1/2 hours to get. At one point he told us to wait and he would be back in 30 minutes because he needed a signature on something. While we were waiting we actually watched a bunch of the workers to nothing for 2 hours. One girl kept chatting with everyone, got coffee a few times, and then looked a pictures for about an hour. We kept joking that the process would go faster if everyone actually worked while they were at work. Around 10:45 we finally got the paper we needed. Andres motioned with his hand to come with him, and literally started running through the halls of ICBF. We literally had to sprint to keep up.

I’ve been trying to describe to Kristen what its like going out and about with him. He moves quick, pushes to the front of the line and gets things done. For example, if someone is at a window getting help, he’ll go to that window anyway, hand in our papers and start talking to the person behind the window. Its been very interesting.

So back to the story, we took a taxi to the US Embassy which was about 5-10 minutes away. As we were driving up to it there were probably 1,000 people waiting in line outside. I have no idea what they were waiting for, but Kristen asked if we needed to wait in that line. Andres said no because we were with him. When the taxi stopped he got out and of course started running full speed. Kristen, the boys, and I got out to chase after him. Literally at a sprint through about a 1,000 people waiting in line to get in. Those people must have either thought we were crazy, hated us, or both. Either way, we got to the front and he just opened the gate to go in. An officer tried to stop him, but he said a few things, flashed a couple papers and they let us through. Amazing. Then we got to another line, and the same thing. He cut in front everyone (only about 20 people this time), move the chain to the side and started to go in. Of course an officer tried to stop him but he kept on going. The officer continued to try, and so Andres motioned for someone else to come over. Some lady came over, Andres said a few things and they let us past everyone again. It was crazy. The actual application process for the visas took us less than an hour then back to our hotel. When we got there the guy behind the window said the closed at 12:00 which I guessed is why we had to sprint to get there. The funny thing is, after we were done and were heading back out to grab a taxi, Andres ran back through the crowd to the taxi. I’m still not sure why. Maybe he was hungry.

So the other day Kristen had an incident with the boys and the soccer ball. (refer to a couple posts ago) We made a new rule – no soccer in the backyard area. If the boys wanted to play, I would have to play with them out in the street. *Note that its a dead end street with little to no traffic, and there are construction workers that play full games out there everyday during lunch. So Victor and I went out this afternoon to kick the ball. Next thing you know, Victor launches one real high and it lands on the windshield of an older model (but very nice condition) Ford truck. *smack!* Victor didn’t think too much of it, and tried to keep playing. I knew something wasn’t right so I went to check it out. The ball landed on the truck’s very custom windshield wipers and snapped one of them right in half. Totally broken. Victor grabbed the ball like we were going to continue playing, but I very calmly told him no, we needed to fess up, find the owner, and apologize. He was totally fine with this. Keep in mind, my spanish is horrible (trust me it is), but I have learned the words for ’sorry’ ‘necessary’ ‘be careful’ ‘come with me.’ He apologized and we went out back to play hide & seek.

Of course the owner was a construction worker that wasn’t too happy. I tried negotiating in my very limited spanish the cost of very custom windshield wipers. I was not successful. At the end of the day it cost me $45 bucks. New rule: no soccer anywhere near the hotel. If they want to play we have to walk at least 2 blocks to the nearest park and play in the center of the park, not even near the street.

-Jesus lost a tooth at dinner last night.
-Gracie threw up ALL day yesterday. Literally about 20 minutes after eating or drinking anything. And if you know Gracie, she is constantly drinking. She has stopped, luckily.
-I, Kristen, am learning how to drink my coffee black. This is huge.
-When driving around Bogota, the boys are so excited to see those big busses that are twice as long as usual.
-Jesus was really scared to get his shot.
-Victor takes longer in the morning getting ready than I do.
-Victor likes to wear outfits to bed instead of pajamas.
-We share a bathroom with my mom and when Jesus got up in the middle of the night to go to the “bano”, he totaly walked in on my mom! It was hilarious!
-Ava loves playing UNO and usually wins.
-Jeff and I really don’t like the movie Narnia. We like it less the more we watch it.
-Jeff really likes the City of Bogota and all the modern buildlings
-Its difficult to plan any day activities because Jeff has been leaving randomly, and Grace has been sick

We’ve been expecting this day to come. We’ve seen glimpses of “what might lie ahead” with the boys. We’ve read countless books of how to handle certain behavior, how to use discipline instead of punishment, even started practicing certain parenting techniques with our own children months ago. So today was the first time Jesus flat out disobeyed me and crossed the line…

Let me preface by saying that Jeff was not here. I got the pleasure of dealing with this “first” by myself.

Jesus and Victor were out back playing soccer. There is a very small grass area with some toddler slides behind our bed and breakfast. However it is very close to a huge window. We had told the boys over and over again to be careful and kick on the other side of the grass, etc, ect. Well, I guess it was bound to happen. I had just come inside to pour a cup of coffee. I sat down at a table by the window to be able to keep an eye on the boys. All of a sudden it sounds like a bomb went off. They had kicked the ball into the window. Somehow, luckily, the window did not break. But the owner of the b and b, his daughter, and Lucia were all in the room with me.

I said sorry as I sped out the door. I firmly told the boys “No mas” and that they needed to go say sorry to the people inside. Victor, of course, started to do so right away. Jesus kept saying “no” “no” “no” and shaking his head like a teenager with an attitude. We’ve been struggling a little with him listening to us so I bent down to get eye contact with him and he proceded to kick the soccer ball into my face. Then he laughed. Boy that’ll get under your skin! Luckily, I have had PLENTY of experience with kids treating me this way. I’ve developed quite a thick skin. I repeated what I needed him to do, grabbed his hand, and in we went.

Victor said “lo siento” to the owner and big wigs of the place while Jesus still refused. I offered him a choice of saying sorry or go to our room. He refused so up we went. After trying then to say sorry, I still told him to head to our room. He bolts to the room where the girls were both sleeping and tries to escape there. I had to physically remove him from that room. He then started to cry and lay down on the carpet in the hall. This of course upset Victor who can’t stand to see Jesus disobeying so he begins to tell Jesus to do what I ask. We are trying to stop this parenting from Victor so I tell him that I am the mother and i’ve got it. I sent him to go get my book.

I picked up Jesus, who by the way is heavier than he looks, and put him on a bed in the other bedroom. I could imagine and I could understand how scared he might have been at this moment. His first time in trouble with this stranger he calls mother. How did his other mothers treat him in this moment? Understanding all of this, I stayed as quiet and peaceful as possible. I sat on the floor to seem less threatening and began reading my book. I told him we needed to talk about what happened but that I would just read my book until he was ready.

At this point I thought I was in for it. A 2 hour tantrum is sure to come. Instead, eventually he stopped crying. Once he said he was ready and was not glaring at me anymore, we did our best to talk over his behaviors and what he could have done better. The problem is the language. My spanish just sucks. I knew all the things I wanted to say, but of course, didn’t know all the words in spanish so who knows what actually came across.

In the end, he said sorry. He crawled up in my lap and let me hold him and cover him with kisses and reassurances that i love him and will never hurt him. And the whole thing took 5 minutes. Not too bad.

This morning we were told that we couldn’t do anything today because we needed another piece of paper. Around 12:30 our agency worker out of the blue asked us if we wanted to try and get the boys passports today. I said absolutely, and so we left right away. We did not get them, but got close – the process was very long. We wil finish tomorrow morning. They just recently changed the law which added an extra step. We did however get our doctors appointment done which is good. Again, we were told we couldn’t do the doctor without all our papers, but we did it anyway. Tomorrow the US Embassy is closed for Vets day, and so we have to wait until Friday to apply for the visas. We are hopeful that we can get our visas in one day. By the way, we never got new papers today. I’m not sure why they said in the morning that we needed them. I have a feeling alot gets lost in translation.

I will post more details tomorrow. Right now I am writing from my phone which is hard. Nite

This is our first day here at our bed and breakfast with our boys in bogota. It is very different here than in Neiva. The food is taken care for us which is much better than making sandwiches in our room every night. There’s not a room big enough for our family so the girls are sleeping with my mom. Even in our room, we have a twin bed and a queen. So Jesus has been sleeping with me and jeff which means more cuddling (yeah!) and less sleep (what else is new?) So far there’s not much to do here. We took the boys out front to kick the soccer ball around and try to play basketball, but it doesn’t compare to going swimming. There are about 5 other couples here, all who have adopted tiny babies. There is a 7 year old here but he only speaks french. Jesus played with him a little this morning. The b and b is huge and with all the people around, it is much more difficult to keep an eye on all 4 kids than it was in neiva. It also means that more adults are now interacting with my boys and I have to keep an eye out on that whole issues as well. Oh, and we’re the only ones here who speak english so that’s sort of a bummer. everyone else is french. So its weird and almost an isolating feeling. Maybe things will change…

Our official business hasn’t been going as great either. We were hoping that getting here last night would give us 3 business days to get everything done so we could come home saturday. Unfortunetly for us, certain papers were needed that we don’t have yet and therefore we couldn’t get the boys passports today. The US embassy is closed tomorrow due to Veterens Day so there goes another day. And Colombia has a holiday Monday which means we’ll probably finish up our business tuesday and come home wednesday.

So we made it to Bogota safely. Its 12:10 AM and we are trying to get settled in. The boys did great on the flight here and were very excited. There were 9 people of the plane, 7 of them were our group. It was nice because we all got to sit with each other in the back of the plane. Each boy got a window seat and kept talking to each other the entire flight about what they saw out the window. They were a little nervous at the begining, but not too bad at all. Once we got up in the air it was mostly excitement.

We are in a different room at the bed & breakfast. Gracie isn’t doing so well right now. She woke up a baby in the other room. Because we had such a late flight everyone is off schedule. We are getting ready to start a quick movie to get everyone settled down.

More to follow in the morning. For now, good night.

Here we go. On our way to the airport in Neiva, flying to Bogota tonight. Our flight takes off at 9:35 and lands at 10:30. The boys are going crazy with nervous energy and excitement. They have had their backpacks on for an hour now. Wish us all luck. We will try and update once we get there. Neiva was nice, but we are ready to move on.